In lieu of tenable art or a contribution to advancing human dialogue, here are some random facts:
- Periodically Life sort of bashes me up against a rock in the course of natural events. I call this rock Growth, or sometimes Transformation. It is possible that, rather than Life bashing me into this rock, I am the one swimming into it. Either way, there I am, happily drifting on the surf and, next thing you know, up against the granite ledge I go. While there, I try and feel around to figure out the nature of the rock and the reason for my presence there. Then, the tide swells outward again and I drift gently away, not too badly damaged, perhaps wiser. I find I am up against a rock again this week. Not a huge one, but a rock all the same. It is a little hard to write from here. Everything I say or scribble sounds like cats mewling at 2 AM and the nattering of crazy trolls. Afterward, I'm sure it will be very inspiring. Sorry for the general silence.
- Last night, I woke up at 11 PM. 11 something PM, to be precise. Which meant I slept for one and a half hours. After that, I thought repeatedly and involuntarily about a problem at church that is troubling me and read The Financial Lives of Poets. It is an excellent book. However, I am at the point of exhaustion where I believe that I could easily begin having auditory hallucinations.
- This week, I ordered a Tibetan singing bowl from China. I believe this bowl will solve all my problems. We have a huge one at church. When it chimes, like Pavlov's dog, I fall into a trance-like state for just a few, blissful moments. (I don't salivate, so perhaps my analogy is weak.)
- When I ordered the bowl, I received a communication on eBay from the seller. It said: "Dear friend: hello, a few days ago because the network of problem eBay cannot open, can't see information, can't delivery, I'm very sorry. I thank you for the great buyers like you. Your project has been put through the China postal mail and you should accept it within 15-25 days." I read it several times. All my communications this week can be exemplified by this message, which seemed to contradict itself in a friendly way and require an endless cycle of need for more communication.
- My hens need a qualified hen therapist and it turns out that is not me. I am disillusioned beyond words by this lack of aptitude on my part. They simply cannot be made to like one another. My little red hen is intent on the death of the lovely little hens I have raised so that she could have friends. I cannot get across to her how wrong-headed she is being. If you can help me with this, please send reinforcements.
- I have lost my ability to appreciate disagreement this week. I will have to temporarily rename this blog "Faith in Avid Temerity and Intolerance." I am a fraud. I have to sit on my hands to keep from posting snarky and dismissive comments in reply to everyone with whom I don't agree. It turns out if you subtract sleep, this is my personality. I find that disturbing.
- Sometimes it is like that. So it goes.
- Keep the faith for me. For a short time, I will lurk like an angry troll under my bridge, flipping off songbirds until I get a decent night's sleep. Send espresso and friendly comments. Also, I need hen advice, links on homeschooling children with APD and someone to thin my garden beds. I can pay anyone in roasted green chile and troll faces. I also have feathers of various sizes and shapes.
- Popcorn. Just for perspective.